and the past week or so has been full of days like that!
Balancing single motherhood, running a household and working full time is, without a doubt, a stressful task. To use an old cliche I feel I am constantly juggling balls. Given that I can't catch very well ( a sad story I'll save for another time) I'm not doing very well.
At the moment I am overwhelmed by marking. I have a piece of work from nearly 150 students. It has all accumulated over the past couple of weeks and I simply cannot keep up. I'm embarrassed by the number of times students ask me, "Miss, have you marked our work yet?" and that leads to more frustration. The end result is that I get so overwhelmed I find myself paralysed and unable to do much at all.
I've been trying to look after myself better this term. I've been taking the time to focus on my health. I've been planning meals, tracking what I eat, exercising and seeking support from the WW boards. Now, I turn to this blog. And it has been working. I've lost weight and am feeling fitter. The cost, though, has become my work as I simply do not have enough hours in the day to fit it all in. So, I've been falling further and further behind with the result being feelings of dsisatisfaction, stress and anxiety. So what do I do? I usually turn to food. I have certainly improved in that regard. Normally I would be looking for chocolate at work to help me deal with stress. My habits are becoming healthier.
These past two days, though, have been particularly stressful. My Year 12 class have their exam on Friday and most have not even read the book. Their laziness is resulting in me having to work twice as hard at preparing lessons. In addition, I am a year advisor and am looking after the emotional and well being needs of 200 year 8 students and there has been a few issues of late that have been eating up my time. I'm organising an excursion to take them all to the movies to see Alice in Wonderland, and that is a mammoth task. So, both yesterday and today, I made the choice to forego exercise in order to give myself more time to get on top of this marking. I feel better for getting some of it done, but two days without exercise is taking a toll on my mood, energy levels and motivation to eat well. As I finished the pile I was aiming to mark tonight, I found myself reaching for the marhmallows. Then, packing my daughter's lunches, I found myself picking. Oh how easy it is to slip back in to bad habits. I'm menatlly exhausted, so I mindlessly perform habits of old.
How to catch all those balls? I simply don't know. Do you?
It sucks doesn't it...you need to put yourself first, then the rest of it builds up, and then you find yourself at the bottom of the pile again!
ReplyDeleteMarking is one of those many pitfalls of teaching! Planning is another!
It is hard to balance it all together.
Something I have noticed on WW, and at my meetings...there seems to be an abundance of teachers doing the program.
The teaching lifestyle is not good for us! Because we let our work consume our entirety.
We love our job, we do everything for our job and we forget that we need to love ourself. Which means put time in for our self.
The trick is working out the balance. Only you can get this balance right. But never put yourself at the bottom of the pile.
My marking gets away from me, but I am now starting to use my DOTT slightly more effectively, but also I stay at work, lock the door so nobody can come and interrupt me. I am even starting to make sure that I have something easy for hubby to cook on my late nights home. then i don't have to worry!
It can be done...but patience is required, while you work out the balance. You will get there... :)